15 comments«123»Anonymous readerReport 2009-08-18 06:16:28You have got to learn to break your stories into paragraphs–and proofread. x video H.S. 15 comments«123»Anonymous readerReport 2009-08-18 06:16:28You have got to learn to break your stories into paragraphs–and proofread. H.S. I think I’ll edit it properly and repost it.READERReport 2007-05-07 11:44:12Paragraphs would be nice. 15 comments«123»Anonymous readerReport 2009-08-18 06:16:28You have got to learn to break your stories into paragraphs–and proofread. Otherwise, not a bad effort.Anonymous readerReport 2008-11-08 16:33:25Where is part 2AveryTomDeaconHarryReport 2008-08-12 06:56:44Story has potential. 15 comments«123»Anonymous readerReport 2009-08-18 06:16:28You have got to learn to break your stories into paragraphs–and proofread. English TeacherREADERReport 2006-06-14 03:09:44part 2 please«123» Otherwise, not a bad effort.Anonymous readerReport 2008-11-08 16:33:25Where is part 2AveryTomDeaconHarryReport 2008-08-12 06:56:44Story has potential. H.S. I think I’ll edit it properly and repost it.READERReport 2007-05-07 11:44:12Paragraphs would be nice. I think I’ll edit it properly and repost it.READERReport 2007-05-07 11:44:12Paragraphs would
